OkCupid tells me I’m a Sonnet:

Romantic, hopeful, and composed. You are the Sonnet. Get it? Composed?

Sonnets want Love and have high ideals about it. They’re conscientious people, caring & careful. You yourself have deep convictions, and you devote a lot of thought to romance and what it should be. This will frighten away most potential mates, but that’s okay, because you’re very choosy with your affections anyway. You’d absolutely refuse to date someone dumber than you, for instance.

Lovers who share your idealized perspective, or who are at least willing to totally throw themselves into a relationship, will be very, very happy with you. And you with them. You’re already selfless and compassionate, and with the right partner, there’s no doubt you can be sensual, even adventurously so.

You probably have lots of female friends, and they have a special soft spot for you. Babies do, too, at the tippy-top of their baby skulls.

This is true. All of this is true.
I found someone. And I’m going to fall in love with him, I think. What’s funny is that I’m not going to meet him for a little while. He doesn’t live near me. And already, in our 24 hours of internet correspondence (and my intent profile reading) I have deduced I am going to like him very much, from afar.

This is a familiar, yet forgotten, feeling. When was the last time I pined for someone I couldn’t have? Well, there’s Cornelius, the young man about whom I’ve written an entire play – a whirlwind of prepubescent pining – and for him I wait. But this new one, this gentle giant, the possibilities are endless.

How to begin the grieving process?
I believe I am almost ready now.
I have bitched and moaned and cried and written, or at least tried.
Tried? Or was it more like allowed to seep through the cracks when I had a moment to stop resisting.
I believe I am ready to look over the edge now.
I am ready to plunge into the water.
Almost.

You, distant man, you will help me. Because you are available, but not yet attainable. Because the Unacceptable Answers you possess happen to be how I actually feel on subjects, but am too afraid to broadcast. Because you are driven, and optimistic, and kind, and articulate, and tall. So, so tall. And large. Pin me down, son. Pin me down such that I can barely breathe and then whisper the gentlest nothings in my ear, such that I have no choice but to hear the beautiful words that spill from your lips.

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